If I were the coworker of such a person (and I do mean coworker, not HR and not the manager) I would do one of two things:

1.? I would adopt three catch phrases:? “that’s nice,” “mmmm, interesting,” and “that’s not true.” The “that’s nice”/”mmmm interesting” comes out whenever she starts preaching and condemning.? The “that’s not true” is for when she claims she’s being discriminated against.? For instance:

Situation 1

You:? I’m going skiing this weekend.

Her:? Don’t you know that Friday/Saturday/Sunday (I don’t know her religion, so I’ll just throw in 3 potential holy days) is a holy day!? People who ski on Friday/Saturday/Sunday will burn in Hell!!!!!!!

You:? That’s nice.

Her:? Haven’t you read [relevant scripture from relevant holy book] that clearly says you’ll go to Hell??????

You:? That’s a nice scripture, I’m sure.

Situation 2

You:? I’m looking forward to the company holiday party next week.

Her:? You are just discriminating against me because I don’t celebrate Christmas.? This company is always discriminating against me because of my beliefs.

You:? That’s not true.

Her:? Yes it is true.? You shouldn’t have a Christmas party because it’s against my religion.

You:? Mmmm, interesting.

Her:? I said, Christmas parties are against my religion.

You:? Mmmm, interesting.

The goal of this is to politely shut her up.? If you won’t engage in her arguments she’ll run out of steam pretty quickly.? The only reason I have added in the option of “that’s not true” is because it’s pretty rude to claim you’re being discriminated against when you’re not.? I don’t want her getting away with it.? If she attacks you directly, i.e. “all [insert your religion or lack thereof here] are so mean to [people of my religion]” you can throw in a nice, “that’s an interesting assumption.”

It’s important that all of this be said blandly.? The idea is to not engage and not feed the troll.

2.? Engage in genuine discussion with her. Talking about religion makes her happy.? Strike that.? about religion makes her happy.? If you can stop the arguing, she’ll be kind of stuck won’t she?

Situation 1:

You:? I’m going skiing this weekend.

Her:? Don’t you know that Friday/Saturday/Sunday is a holy day!? People who ski on Friday/Saturday/Sunday will burn in Hell!!!!!!!

You:? Wow.? That’s fascinating.? Can you tell me more about that?

And then you listen with “mmm, interestings” thrown in.? No disagreeing or agreeing, just interesting.

Situation 2:

You:? I’m looking forward to the company holiday party next week.

Her:? You are just discriminating against me because I don’t celebrate Christmas.? This company is always discriminating against me because of my beliefs.

You:? That’s fascinating.? Can you tell me a bit more about why you feel discriminated against?

This takes the steam right out of the person.? It’s hard to argue when someone is politely asking you to tell them more about your position.? You don’t have to agree to anything or change your mind about a thing.? Just nicely get her to stop ranting.

Now please keep in mind that this advice is for coworkers only.? You must not have supervisory/hire/fire/evaluation authority over this woman.? If you’re her manager, that’s a whole different ball game, although this tends to work well if the offender (or shall we say, the easily offended) is your boss.? If you’re the manager, you need to actually, you know, manage this person. But that’s a completely different post, which you can now read:? Managing the Complainers Before They Sue for Discrimination.

Got a workplace dilemma? Email your questions to EvilHRLady@gmail.com.

Photo by Carbon NYC, Flick cc 2.0

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